She; Oh my, how am I expected to go to a meeting looking like this?
Me; Looking like what exactly? (With a skew eye and puzzlement all across my face)
She; My nails…..they have lost their appearance and I have to get them re-done ASAP.
Me; (lost in amazement and thinking to myself ), “shouldn’t you be worried about the agenda of the meeting and what your contribution is going to be than worrying about a chipped nail, especially at the 11th hour?
This got me thinking about our state of minds and choices as young adults of the 21 century, where we fail to accept ourselves for who we are and have to resort to torturing ourselves with putting on fake nails on our fingers, and sewing in fake hair on our heads. We sit for hours on end in hair salons sewing somebody else’s hair on our heads. Really? Is that really what we have been reduced to? People with no appreciation of our authentic self, who are on a quest to be validated by looking like someone, anyone other than themselves?
I am not saying that people should not take care of themselves or try to look good, but let there be limits and boundaries please. I honestly see no fun in walking around looking like an exotic “mamacita” from a fancy island when you look at me from behind, only to be confronted by a plain-Jane-pimpled-girl next-door face at the front.
I care little about politics or anyone that looks down at me because I’m black; racists if you may, but as black people, are we not giving the same condescending people that looked down at us centuries ago (and still do) the power?. Are we not saying to them, “on second thought; you are right, i am a monkey that looks ugly in its natural state, so please enlighten me. Please cut some of your hair, hand it over to me so I can sew it on and look beautiful just like you?” Is it not enough that we get to process (relax) our hair to get rid of it’s natural, sometimes unmanageable kinks? Do we really have to go digging up in people’s dustbins for their hair, just so that we can look trendy and be accepted ? I know a lot of Caucasian folk also use hair extensions, but for heaven’s sake the hair already looks like their own. Don’t even get me started on Botox…..
Recently some ladies were out on the town having their girl’s date out or something like that when the topic of taking care of one self came up. Most supported the notion that ladies should stop neglecting themselves, make an effort to look good, put on some make up, make an effort to wear proper fitting and well chosen clothes and the likes, when another very pretty tomboyish “lady” spoke out and said. “I appreciate the sentiment behind what you ladies are saying, but forgive me for i will not walk around looking like i’ve smeared peanut butter on my face, all in the name of taking care of myself”. Hahahahaha, well i guess the peanut butter bit is a little extreme although we see it everyday, but there are folk that believe the more foundation, the better, not realising that putting on a little here and there is good, rather than caking ourselves with the thing.
I appreciate the human want and desire to be beautiful, to look clean and neat and I’m no different, I also want the very same. We all want to be fashion forward and be seen to be in with it, trendy that is to say, but are we not pushing the limits a bit too much now? Where is our sense of self? Is it too much to learn to accept ourselves and live with any of our aesthetic shortcomings, rather than handing over our self esteem and confidence on a silver platter to the ludicrous world of silicone,acrylic and Brazilian hair?
It is not so much the peanut butter effect and sewing in that get to me, it is the sense of self worth that seems to fizzle away when one isn’t done up (at least for most people) and the funny “she’s-from-the-stone-age” looks that people give if one’s nails or hair aren’t bought.
When did buying and replacing god given nails, hair and bums become a currency for self worth and socialization?